Shop

Note: For every $100 folks spend here, $10 gets donated to the National Center for Science Education. Thanks.

ABC Oakland

I’m thrilled to announce the release of my latest kids’ book ABC Oakland. It’s a love letter (get it?) to my favorite city and town. There’s events happening all over Oakland to celebrate; see the event listing here. “Bursting with civic pride, ABC Oakland encourages children and adults alike to explore the possibilities that “The Town” has to offer.”

size: 8″ x 10″
price: $17

Buy Me

Posters

showgirls poster (see it all)

Free lap dance with every large corn! Here’s a three-color blacklight-ready extravaganza (printed by Bloom Press) created for the 20th anniversary of Peaches Christ’s tribute to one of the most fantashorrible movies ever. See more here.
size: 18 x 24
price: $40

vegas in space poster (see it all)

Glamour First, Glamour Last, Glamour Always! This is a four-color neon freakout (printed by yours truly) created to commemorate the 25th anniversary of Phil Ford’s 80′s camp classic. See more here.
size: 18 x 24
price: $45

driveway follies 2016 (see it all)

This one is for the kids of all ages who enjoy a little Halloween cheer all year long. Aunt Grandma says “Don’t Forget to Brush Your Fangs!”. This one features spooky glow-in-the-dark imagery. Not for Puritans.
size: 18 x 24
price: $25

CVB winter tour 2016/7 (see it all)

This year’s Winter Poster celebrates the fearsome Fishnu the Destroyer, who wields the power of chemistry. She our the protector as we approach the approaching timeframe. What will happen? Not even Fishnu knows.
size: 12 x 18
price: $25

ALO TDA 2017 (see it all)

Once again, lovers (and lovers of lovers), it’s time for ALO’s “Tour D’Amour”. This one’s on a creamy off-white stock in two outta-sight sophisti-bright colors. Guaranteed to get you dancing (and cuddling) with a neighbor.
size: 12 x 18
price: $20

campout 2016 poster (see it all)

The owls are not what they seem, ladies and gentlepeople. My log… saw something that night. Ask it. A 3-color poster lovingly printed by Bloom Press.
size: 24 x 18
price: $20

campout 2015 poster (enlarge)

A three-color screenprinted poster for this year’s Campout festival in Pioneertown, California. This doggod? She’s kinda like an Egyptian cartoon. Printed by Bloom Press.
size: 18 x 24
price: $25

campout 2014 poster (see full image)

These weirdo cowboy 2-color posters sold out at Campout, but we have a small stack for sale here for you. Printed by Nat Swope at Bloom Press in Oakland.
size: 18 x 24
price: $25

campout 2013 poster (see full image)

Here’s a two color eye-banger for this year’s Campout based on the Aztec Calendar, the Old Gods, and Wacko Mysticism. Number 9. Number 9. Number 9. Number 9.
size: 18 x 24
price: $25

monks of doom poster (enlarge)

I just came across a small stack of these Monks of Doom posters I did for their gig at Café Du Nord (rip). What has become of Millicent Frastley? Is there any hope that she is still alive?
size: 18 x 24
price: $25

CVB 14/15 poster (full image)

From Berkeley to Bakersfield to points beyond, Cracker & Camper Van Beethoven are headed your way. It’s cold outside, but it’s warm in the club. 2-color screenprinted poster.
size: 12 x 18
price: $10

3-color egypt (enlarge)

Whilst combing through the flat files, I came across a short stack of these 3-color CVB lovelies from 2008. This is the second screenprinted poster I did for the fellas. Want one?
size: 15 x 17.5
price: $30

Prints

pink smoke: phyllis diller (enlarge)

A print as short as Fang, and just as cheap! This is a a 3-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 10. This was created for the show For The Love of Phyllis Diller.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $50

judy judy judy (enlarge)

This print of Judy Garland was created for Night of 1000 Judys and is in an edition of 47 prints, one for every year Judy lived. A portion of the proceeds from this print will benefit The Ali Forney Center.
size: 12 x 18
price: $25

santa cruz triptych (enlarge)

This 3-color hand-pulled screenprint sends you to one of our favorite places : lovely Santa Cruz, California. Produced for Artisans Gallery. It’s a trip-tych!
size: 20 x 16
price: $20

secrets of the dog park (enlarge)

I was asked to contribute to a Tom of Finland tribute show, and this image is what I came up with. 3 color screenprint on delicious acid-free Rives BFK paper.
size: 15 x 22, image size 10 x 10
price: $25


ferdinand the bull (his) (enlarge)

Ferdinand the Bull is the story of the giant scary bull who just wanted to hang out in the shade and smell the flowers. Righteous! This is also about something else.
size: 9 x 23
price: $40

ferdinand the bull (hers) (enlarge)

This is the blue and magenta version of the Ferdinand print. These were both printed by the ever-patient Nat Swope at Bloom Press. They came out great!
size: 9 x 23
price: $40

bighead (enlarge)

Say hello to Bighead. This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 5. A portion of the proceeds will benefit Oakland Animal Services.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

bowie (enlarge)

Say hello to Bowie. This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 5. A portion of the proceeds from this print will benefit Oakland Animal Services.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

dahlia (enlarge)

Say hello to Dahlia. This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 5. A portion of the proceeds from this print will benefit Oakland Animal Services.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

magentablue cat (enlarge)

You like kittehs, right? This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 3. A portion of the proceeds from this print will benefit Oakland Animal Services.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

ears (enlarge)

My, what big ears you have! This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 5. A portion of the proceeds from this print will benefit Oakland Animal Services.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

olive (enlarge)

A portrait of a lady. This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 5. A portion of the proceeds from this print will benefit Oakland Animal Services.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

shower like a sailor (enlarge)

This print was created for the CCA “Drought” Alumni/Faculty show. This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 3.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

good clean fun (enlarge)

This print was created for the SOME WAGS show at Glama-Rama. This is a a 2-color print done with hand-cut stencils in an edition of 3.
size: print 11 x 17, paper 19 x 24
price: $100

Products

dog park secrets (enlarge)

Shh. Here’s what really happens at the dog park. Also available as a three-color print (scroll up). See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

blue campout (enlarge)

Here’s blue the dog [as seen on the campout 2015 poster] brought to ipad cases, pillows, and bags. See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

stand for peace (enlarge)

Originally printed as a 2-color poster for the OMCA. We’re offering this as pillows, journal covers, and stickers. Boots! See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

timothy’s shoes (enlarge)

Originally printed as a two-color letterpress print for the book dog dreams. Timothy is now available as pillows and totes. See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

sutro tower (enlarge)

Here’s a bunch of products based on my two-color screenprint of Sutro Tower in SF. Totes, notebook covers, phone cases and more! See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

a d and d (enlarge)

This was originally printed as a two-color poster, and is now leggings, phone cases, pillows, and notebook covers. See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

blue and orange (enlarge)

Here’s a screenprinted test print brought to a variety of 1970s-flavored products. Supergroovy. Totes, skirts, bags, journals. See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

paper texture 1 (enlarge)

And now: a color test created with three transparent colors and torn paper featured on bags, notebook covers, and phone covers. See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

airquotes (enlarge)

This was a small print that was included in a cd package for bay area weirdos legends Big City Orchestra. See more here.
size: various
price: various

Buy Me

Books

dog dreams (enlarge)

Originally printed by hand in a limited letterpress edition of 100 copies at the SF Center for the Book, Dog Dreams is now available from the kind folks at Gingko Press.
size: 7″ square
price: $15

Buy Me

dog dreams ebook

The good people at Hard Boiled Industries saw fit to turn Dog Dreams into an ebook for iphone and ipad and whatnot. Read aloud by yours truly, plus extra goodies.
size: how big are bits and bytes?
price: $3.99

Buy Me

queen for two weeks (enlarge)

A collaborative artists’ book by myself and Jim Winters. Seven prints of queens and seven prints of crests folded into one cool little book. See more images here.
size: 5.5 tall x 80 wide
price: $30

a spectacular selection of sea critters (enlarge)

the third offering from betsy franco and yours truly! this one’s about the critters you’d find whilst snorkeling in the ocean. sample some images here.
size: 8 x 10
price: $17 or so

Buy Me

a dazzling display of dogs (enlarge)

The follow-up to A Curious Collection of Cats is here! 40 pages of Poetry by Betsy Franco, Illustration and lettering by The Wertzateria. See more images here.
size: 6.5 x 19
price: $17 or so

Buy Me

a curious collection of cats (enlarge)

my first picture book! concrete poems by betsy franco, illustrations by yours truly. 40 pages of cats and poetry to share & discuss. fun for lovers of all four-pawed critters.
size: 8 x 10
price: $17 or so

Buy Me

Music

CVB : La Costa Perdida (enlarge)

The new CVB record is here, and it’s a goody goody. 10 new tracks from your favorite tin-foil-hatted weirdos. The whole package was lovingly designed by yours truly.

size: cd fits perfectly in cd player

price: $9.99

Buy Me

CVB : El Camino Real (enlarge)

The follow-up to La Costa Perdida, El Camino Real explores the southern portion of our fine state. The whole shebang – design and illustration – was meticulously crafted by yours truly.

size: cd fits perfectly in cd player

price: $9.99

Buy Me

the palace guards (enlarge)

David Lowery presents a collection of songs recorded in his studio in Richmond Virginia. Cover and packaging by yours troolee.

size: cd fits perfectly in cd player

price: $9.99

Buy Me

popular songs (enlarge)

If you’re new to Camper Van Beethoven, this is a good place to start. Cover and delightful packaging by your fren mikel.

size: cd fits perfectly in cd player

price: $9.99ish

Buy Me

the start of things (enlarge)

Alison Faith Levy gives us a collection of rich, beautiful songs for kids (of any age). Recommended. Packaging by me.

size: cd fits perfectly in cd player

price: $9.99

Buy Me

world of wonder (enlarge)

Alison Faith Levy makes beautiful music – her voice is from the heavens! CD packaging by your internets neighbor (me).

size: cd fits perfectly in cd player

price: $9.99

Buy Me

thanks for shopping at wertzateria.com!

we hope you enjoy your items, and please know that we’re grateful for your business.

  • privacy statement: we do not share any personal information gathered online with outside companies
  • paypal: we are a paypal verified seller
  • shipping policy: we estimate one or two weeks for you to receive your products
  • return policy: all sales are final. these products are made by hand. some slight variations are expected with any art piece — that’s what makes them unique!